How to Stop Fighting Step #2  Overcoming the Hurt: Replacing Humiliation with Respect

Option A. Stand Up for Yourself

Standing up for oneself is usually good if one has acted fairly and honorably toward the other.

But it can still be done in a respectful and de-escalating way.

It might be helpful, for example, to use I-messages to explain your own point of view, and active listening to learn more about why the other person feels disrespected. (Both of these techniques are explained further below).

To learn more, read an article on respect.

If you have NOT acted entirely fairly and honorably, then admitting that and apologizing can go a long way towards de-escalating a difficult relationship.

You then need to work together to figure out how to mend the relationship and begin joint problem solving to avoid future problems.

To learn more, read an article on I-messages, active listening, or apologies.

Photo Credit: Spiral stairs. By Petar Milošević (Own work). CC BY-SA 4.0, via Wikimedia Commons.