How to Stop Fighting Step #4 Fighting Fair: Developing a System for Handling Disputes

Option C. Designate an "authority figure" who makes decisions after consultation.

This approach isn't inherently right or wrong. It depends on the circumstances and the values of the disputants.

For example:

• If the dispute is between a parent and a child,
• or an employee and the boss...

Both sides may agree (reluctantly, perhaps) that the parent or the boss is ultimately responsible for making the decision.

But if the "authority figure" takes the views of the child or employee into account, the conflict is likely to be resolved more easily, and quite possibly more permanently.

If the "authority figure" seems to make arbitrary decisions that ignore the other person's legitimate needs or interests, however, the conflict is likely to continue or even get worse.

Photo Credit: UN Twisted Gun by Karl Fredrik Reuterswar. By Campbell. CC BY-NC-SA 2.0.