Love and Forgiveness in Governance: Exemplars: Immaculée Ilibagiza

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By Ernest Ogbozor

Immaculée Ilibagiza is a motivational speaker and a preacher. In spite of the ordeal she went through during the Rwanda genocide, she said, "I knew that my heart and mind would always be tempted to feel anger — to find blame and hate. But I resolved that when the negative feelings came upon me, I wouldn't wait for them to grow or fester. I would always turn immediately to the Source of all true power: I would turn to God and let His love and forgiveness protect and save me."[1] In her book, Left to Tell: Discovering God Amidst the Rwandan Holocaust, she acknowledges the role love and forgiveness played in transforming her life from despair to fulfillment.

Immaculée Ilibagiza was born in Rwanda in 1972. She is the only daughter of four children of the late Leonard Ilibagiza and Rose Ilibagiza of Mataba village, Rwanda. After her elementary school and high school education, she studied Electronic and Mechanical Engineering at the National University of Rwanda, Butare. Her parents were devoted Christians and they brought her up knowing the Lord. According to Immaculée, the genocide started on April 7th, 1994 when she returned home for the Easter holiday, to have fun with her family. The Ilibagiza family were Tutsis; Immaculée, at the request of her parents, was taken to hide in a bathroom of a Hutu neighbor.

She came close to death at the peak of the genocide. According to her, while she was hiding in the bathroom, she survived repeated visits from the Hutu killers searching for new Tutsi victims. On the very first visit, one killer actually put his hand on the bathroom door but didn't open it. On another visit, the killers called Ilibagiza's name, saying, "I have killed 399 cockroaches, Immaculée will make it 400. It's a good number to kill."[2] Emotionally, she suffered exactly what you would expect someone to suffer in such an ordeal: in that moment, she was filled with bitterness and anger at the people who were out to destroy her and her family. [3]

Immaculée's initial message to the killers was, "The blood of the innocent people you cut down will follow you to your reckoning. But I am praying for you... I pray that you see the evil you're doing and ask God's forgiveness before it's too late."[4] As a devout Catholic, she spent most of her time in the bathroom in prayer, and as the ordeal continued, she developed a deeper and deeper relationship with her God. She ended up staying in the bathroom with the other girls for 3 months; she survived the genocide, but discovered that her entire family was killed, except her brother who was studying abroad.[5]

As time went by, Immaculée realized that if she wanted to truly survive — not just physically, but also emotionally and spiritually — she would need to let go of her anger and learn to forgive. It wasn't easy. She struggled with her anger and hatred for the people that had made her empty. When the genocide was over, she visited her home village to give her family members a proper burial and find closure. However, seeing the remains of her home and the decomposed body of one of her beloved brothers brought back her feelings of anger and hatred. The struggle in her soul began anew. But one night, she had a dream in which she saw her family safe and sound. Her brother (the same brother whose body she had seen earlier) said to her, "You must love, and you must forgive those who have trespassed against us."[6] At that moment, she says that although she still grieved the loss of her family, she never again agonized over their suffering.[7]

The final turning point was when Immaculée went to a prison to visit the leader of the gang that had murdered her parents and the brother who had spoken to her in the dream. The gang leader's name was Felicien. She recognized Felicien as the father of some of her childhood friends, and realized that his voice was among those that had called out her name during one of the searches at the pastor's house. Immaculée described the moment of her encounter with Felicien. According to her, Felicien's face turned pale as he saw who was facing him; he looked to the floor. Felicien sobbed, and Ilibagiza wept. Their eyes met for just a moment; she touched his hands and said what she had come to say: "I forgive you."[8]

After that moment, according to Immaculée, "my heart eased immediately, and I saw the tension release in Felicien's shoulders."[9] Semana, who had accompanied Immaculée to the prison, was furious, and he said, "What was that all about, Immaculée? That was the man who murdered your family. I brought him to you to question...to spit on if you wanted to. But you forgave him! How could you do that? Why did you forgive him?"[10] Semana was disappointed, but Ilibagiza said, "Forgiveness is all I have to offer." Immaculée Ilibagiza devoted her life to helping others forgive and heal, especially those who have been victims of genocide. Countless people have learned to forgive the "unforgivable" through her words and example. She concludes her book, Left to Tell... with these words: "The love of a single heart can make a world of difference. I believe that we can heal Rwanda — and our world — by healing one heart at a time".[11] Immaculée is a living example of a leader that practices love and forgiveness in governance.

 

[1] "Left To Tell by Immaculée Ilibagiza - Discovering God Amidst the Rwandan Holocaust", n.d., http://www.lefttotell.com/.

[2] "Virtues Spotlights | Virtues for Life", n.d., http://www.virtuesforlife.com/category/virtues-spotlights/.

[3] "Immaculée Ilibagiza: Forgiving the Rwandan Holocaust", n.d., http://www.circleofa.org/cmw/Immaculée.php.

[4] "Left To Tell by Immaculée Ilibagiza - Discovering God Amidst the Rwandan Holocaust."

[5] "Immaculée Ilibaguza: Left To Tell (Learning To Forgive After Tragedy) - YouTube", n.d., http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SjcOrC8iUrA&feature=related.

[6] "Left To Tell by Immaculée Ilibagiza - Discovering God Amidst the Rwandan Holocaust."

[7] Ibid.

[8] "Immaculée Ilibagiza: Forgiving the Rwandan Holocaust."

[9] Ibid.

[10] Ibid.

[11] Ibid.